Open Letter To My Husband:


I sincerely apologize for yelling at you tonight and shouting, “shut up, I’m counting”, followed by “leave that f*****g light on”.

This behavior most certainly does not reflect my true feelings for you. It only means that I am coming to terms with the fact that I am not the skilled knitter I thought I was and that this cabled cashmere cardigan I am knitting for you is not the creative yoga ANY of my previous projects have been.

I feel like a flippin’ CPA with all this counting and I think I might have told you before how that bean counting makes me feel.

Plus, I balanced all the books today and was feeling just a little…taken for granted, since when I sat down to mindlessly watch television, you asked me how I was coming along with your sweater. That turns it into a project to complete, instead of something to while away the hours.

So, as I count and frog and swear, don’t take it personally.

Look at it as an adventure in matrimony.

And if you do get this sweater? You had damn well better wear it to shreds.

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