They tackled the wrong woman.Read at your own risk

After yesterday, today was NOT the day for the lady next door to trot over a 0700 to tell me that she doesn’t like my ONE wind chime. No problemo. I will simply move it furthur onto my property, so she can’t just reach over and tie it up with a shoestring. And while I’m at it, I’m getting another one of those big Japanese bonging ones.

Then the neighborhood busy body came over (BEFORE COFFEE) to mention that she and the neighbors didn’t like that I’d ripped out the ice plant, sprayed it all with Round up and then not planted anything in 2 months. Well fal la effen la, it take that long to kills that ugly ice plant.

But no problemo. I put in $239 OF SUCCULENTS this morning, hosed off the patio and plan to dig big effing la la holes all over. If they didn’t like the way I had it before, They will at least be amazed at what I do next. It sort of what genitalia looking plants I can find at the nursery.

Today was not the day to talk to the lady with the black eyes. I was JUST A TAD TOUCHY.

Now Albear’s doggy mama? She could have asked me anything, Jump off the roof. Let me get a ladder. Put up new steps to the patio…I can do that RIGHT NOW. And would Albear like a little doggie door so he could nose around my year? Not the least bit of an inmpostiton. I love Albear.

Better than I like a lot of people.
Now Albear’s mother is a gentell, French lady, in the truest sense of the work. Albear is this huge white French dog who is is in love with Rocket. Mme spends gentile afternoons watching the dogs frolic and we drink tea and eat little sandwiches and she attempts to reinstate my rusting and horrific French. We knit and sit in the sunshine.
My idea of a good neighbor.

Miss Windchime. No.
Miss Ice plant. Certainly not.
And I am going out for fushia hanging plants and more hummer feeders. Because fa fla f’in la it make me happy.

And today, my own personal happiness is the only thing that matters to me.
I have pepper spray, a taser and it would not bother me the least to use either or both until they run out of juice.


3 thoughts on “They tackled the wrong woman.Read at your own risk

  1. I ripped out ice plant last year and it came back in multiples, so I get it! You are a very funny neighbor and I like the way you retaliate! Go girlfriend!

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