I know I’m not the only woman on the planet who has been betrayed. Family members, girlfriends, boyfriends, fiancees, husbands….betrayal comes in many and mainly ugly forms. One husband I had (Poor John) told women that I had died on our honeymoon., That seemed to make panties drop pretty effectively. Another husband (Jackson) managed to cheat his way thru every DAY of eight years of marriage. I once had a close friend who has cut me out of her life. No matter, really. How close can you be to a person who takes 45 years and decides that is that?
This betrayal is the worst, I think. It’s not my husband (who has pretty much been in the hospital for the bulk of the last two years, including the harrowing January of 2012. Suffice to say, I know where the best hospital cafeteria is (RMC-Fresno) and the best sleep chairs for overnight stays (Fresno Heart Hospital). I know where to park, what to wear and what to leave behind. I’ve ridden choppers off roofs with nary a thought of how I was going to get back. (Always managed, so far.)
So this betrayal of trust is not within my immediate family, which makes it easier to define and delineate my anger, I confided some deep worries and concerns and she promptly turns around and repeats them in the absolutely worst possible light to someone I would NEVER have mentioned them to.
I’m sure you know how it is…no sleep for three days, worry on top of worry and finally someone you think you can just unburden yourself to.
And not a mistake I’ll make ever again. We don’t live close enough to visit and when she calls, I can limit my conversation to my dogs, my shoes, my nails. I’ve changed her ID on my phone to Snake in the Grass.
There are LOTS of people I don’t like. I don’t like pervs in general or administrators. I usually don’t trust people who like cats over dogs (I’m a dog and cat person myself) and I have no patience with people who don’t care for animals at all. (Something WRONG there, IMO.)
I prefer country people over city people but have found to my surprise that the ink and piercings don’t always make a person bad., Or good.
So here at Casa Chloe, we are good. I’m nursing my husband back to health (he’s walking just fine and has almost quit smoking. However, after 30 years of NOT smoking, I would kill for just one puff. I was a four pack a day gal in the days when doctors handed Valium out like M&M’s and you could step out of your classroom to smoke. It was almost good for you. But I didn’t like the way it smelled and I just up and quit when I decided to have children. But the craving never goes away.
So my short list is longer by one name and sadly, most of the other betrayers are dead and if they aren’t, I curse them with boils and cold sores until I get around to REALLY cursing them, which will just pop out of my head, simmering hot and suitable to the betrayer. A proper curse is no good if you have to think about it.