Fixing the veranda floor and the spindles..it’s an 0330 project

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. W. Somerset Maugham

Tomorrow at 0330, we are fixing the veranda floor. First, everything has to be moved to one side and the empty side pressure washed.Then around 0415, when it is all dry (remember, it is HOT here), we’ll cut all the torn spots, roller them down and while they are sticking, have breakfast. Then we’ll use a roller paint brush and roll on that elastic merit stuff (it is sort of like a thin rubberized stuff) and sit on the porch swing and watch it dry. That should take about an hour. We can climb in and out of the library window to get more coffee.

Once it is dry (I get to be the tester..if it sticks to my feet, it’s not dry enough), we’ll roll a pretty green merit with fine grit in it, sit on the the swing a wait some more. Ben will probably go down to the corner store and get us some watermelon punch, which is really good. And cheap. Once that is dry, well move all the stuff from one side to the other side go back in the house and sleep some. That 0330 is really early and by now, it is REALLY hot and will only get hotter.

Then tomorrow, we do the very same thing, except well be sitting on patio chairs instead of the porch swing. Do the same thing. Climb in and out of the guest room window to get stuff. Sit around and wait for stuff to dry. Roll on the the green merit with fine grit and watch it dry, the go back to bed becuase by then it will be REALLY HOT. (Good for drying stuff; not so good for living. But like my dad always said, “Good for the farmers”)

Then the next day at 0330 we paint patches of StripEx, let it set and then strip it off with saranwrap. I have a little dremel tool that will strip off any paint that doesn’t zip right off.  Then we have breakfast and go out to check to see if the old paint is peeling yet. One thing about spindles and fretwork, there is a LOT of detail that has to be fiddled with. Once it is all stripped, I put on a pair of plastic gloves and a pair of sponge gloves and do all the spindles and the fretwork. Mike does the flat parts because I am closer to the ground. Then after everything is dry, tomorrow we do the same thing to the parts of the veranda that sticks out over the side walk (me, becuse I like to do that rapelling stuff) and all of the posts (me again because I like to jump off backwards and go boing! boing! on the posts). I paint thegoop on, slap the saranwrap on and then have some breakfast. By now, there is some traffic on the street (my favorite part) and I rappel Boing! Boing! and strip off the peeling paint from the posts.

THEN tomorrow at 0330, we go out, I rappell down again and paint everything. Last time, we painted it dollar bill green and I never did like it. This time we are painting it with a dark green (my vote) or a purple-y blue. That all dries and then once again at 0330, I rappell with polyurethan and everything should be good for five or six years. The dry air and extreme heat is hard on wood. That’s why a lot of peole use Trex (ugly) or vinyl (even uglier) in my opinion. But not ecery one wants to get up super early and go Boing! Boing! off the side of  a building.

I have discovered one thing about my headaches. They start usually at 0730, so I can get a lot done when it is cool. It is an odd thing but most cluster-ers are on a time table and get them at the same time every day. Weird, huh? Mine start at 0730 usually with the business end of a baseball bat or the hind foot of a donkey, which packs more WHAM than that of a horse. It’s the way their legs are put together. Sometimes I get a fish knive jammed right into my eye socket (nothing says good morning like a fish knife) and lately, I’ve been getting a curved peach knife jammed in there. I told one of my many doctors it felt just like being kicked in the head by a donkey while I was cleaning his feet and he told me he had no experience with farm animals at all. That left me speechless, let me tell you. But then again, Mike came from a rich family and not only had no experience with farm animals, they went on VACATIONS in AIRPLANES. I was 18 when I took my first plane trip and my MOTHER was 65. So Mike and I come from totally different worlds.

Although it totally gobsmacks me that so many people have NO experience with farm animals. I don;t think anyone in my entire TOWN could say that. Even Lisi has seen a calf born and has been cow licked. They both have helped me deliver puppies and kittens, which is as earthy as you can get.

 

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